Article from Baby Center online:

Your 6 Year Old Now...

Potty Language

Young kids curse for a variety of reasons – which are worth remembering when your ears are burning and your blood pressure's rising. Some do it to shock their parents; they know now that certain words are forbidden and may get a rise from you. Sometimes they're just trying to show off in front of peers and older kids. They may also curse when they're angry or upset, simply copying behavior they see in other adults or teens or on TV.

Set firm rules about bad language. (And recognize that these rules apply to grownups as well – if you use those naughty words yourself, you can't expect your child not to use them.) Apply consequences when someone breaks the rules. Be sure to acknowledge your child's efforts to refrain from swearing, especially in times of stress or frustration.

At this age, kids may not understand how offensive bad language can be to others. They're still wrapped up in themselves. You may also want to explain what racist and sexist terms mean, if they come up, and how upsetting they can be.

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Is your child gifted?

There are many kinds of giftedness: in language, in math, in music, in sports. If your child seems challenged in school and happy, her aptitude may not be a critical issue at this age. But if she's bored or complains her schoolwork is way too easy, you may want to discuss the issue with her teacher. A true prodigy is rare (and pretty obvious). Giftedness in one area or another is more common.

There's some debate among experts about testing for giftedness. Some recommend testing by a child psychologist at this age, while others question the value of such scores if the child's curiosity and academic needs can be met.

Even if she is gifted, be wary of the label. Gifted kids sometimes fear failure, so they can become afraid to try new things. If they don't succeed, they rationalize, maybe they're not as smart as everybody thinks. Be on the lookout, too, for teasing from classmates. Gifted children can be more sensitive and intense. Their peers pick up on their differences and sometimes aren't so kind.

If your child is placed in a special class or given different work, emphasize that she's being advanced because she's a hard worker, not because she's more talented or smarter. "You practice your violin more, so your teacher thinks you should play in a bigger-kids orchestra now."

Know, too, that giftedness doesn't always manifest itself as overachieving genius. In fact, some gifted kids appear just the opposite. Because they're bored and frustrated in school, they might be fidgety, emotional, and underachieving, leading teachers to think they have attention deficit disorders rather than giftedness.

A bit of praise

The simplest secret weapon you have in keeping life on an even keel with your child is praise. A few words about something your child did or is doing well can defuse a tense situation or head off a tantrum. Praise is also like money in the bank – each kind word or positive observation a deposit that builds up a store of goodwill in your child and actually makes him want to behave better for you. Kids have a deep desire to please their parents.

Try to make your praise specific. If you simply murmur "Nice job!" all day, those words become too vague to register. If you praise a particular act and describe it, that helps your child know what it was about his behavior that was good – and makes him more likely to turn in a fine performance. Compare "Good job" with "Thanks for stopping your play to give your sister her toy when she dropped it – that was really helpful to me."

Birthday ideas

Looking for good birthday-gift ideas for your child's peers? Fortunately, kids this age are still pretty easy to please. A good rule of thumb is to buy something your child would like.

Feeding a collection is usually a hit, although duplicates are a risk. Kids this age also love to experiment and use their imaginations. Presents that inspire creativity are always good – think arts and crafts supplies, building blocks, or science kits.

One fresh take is a present that allows the birthday boy or girl to spend time with your child. Maybe you can give a certificate to go miniature golfing together or offer up a movie night. Or make small items seem like a big deal by presenting a basket of themed goodies, all wrapped individually – a sports kit might include Whiffle balls, baseball cards, and a baseball book, for example.

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Talking Back

Be firm about what you do expect. If "whatever" isn't an acceptable response to a request, make sure he knows it. If he continues to say it, follow through on whatever consequences you've discussed.

When everyone has calmed down, discuss the disrespect. Let him know you can see that he's upset, but calling you "poophead" isn't going to solve anything. See if you can get to the bottom of his frustration. Maybe he won't get the mail for you because he's afraid of the neighbor's dog. Walk him through more productive ways to handle his fear. Role-play what he could have said ("I'm scared Mrs. Smith's dog will bite me") and try to come up with a workable solution together.

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Loveable 7's

Congratulations on another step down the road toward growing up. Sevens are delightful to be around. They've shed a bit more of the neediness and uncertainty of younger years, and bring enthusiasm and curiosity to everything they do. Mastering skills like reading and simple math gives your child a confidence and excitement about academics.

Sevens tend to ask lots of questions, because they're keen observers with a big need to know about everything. They thrive on order but are better able to roll with change than they used to be.

Your 7-year-old is mature enough to form his own opinions about many things. He looks to peers and other adult authority figures to inform his ideas. But his parents firmly remain the shining lights in his universe. Sevens still like to cuddle, hold hands, and show their affection in ways that typically vanish (at least in public) over the coming years.

Consider...

As your child looks, talks, and acts older, remember that he's still not so big. He depends on you as much as ever for guidance and discipline. Try to always keep your expectations in line with his age and developmental abilities.

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